Sunday, March 30, 2003
Yesterday was my last day at work. Very strange. The past four days have been particularly odd. All 18 Exec Doc students sucessfully defended their dissertations. They are now just about set to graduate.
Friday night was a big celebration. Although the planning was a nightmare and it caused a multitude of headaches for me and particularly for the intern team, the event was wonderful and went off without a hitch. Michael and I were talking on Saturday AM about the way things went on Friday: we likened it to leaving summer camp, a retreat, or leadership training weekend. Everyone was really emotional and when we left the event, it seemed that people's relationships had changed. It was a nice way to end my nearly two years with the Executive Doctorate.
Tomorrow begins my unemployment. I want to work out, continue reading Jen Weiner's In Her Shoes, continue job hunting, send out a few resumes, and make some calls about looking at new apartments. Busy day!
Friday night was a big celebration. Although the planning was a nightmare and it caused a multitude of headaches for me and particularly for the intern team, the event was wonderful and went off without a hitch. Michael and I were talking on Saturday AM about the way things went on Friday: we likened it to leaving summer camp, a retreat, or leadership training weekend. Everyone was really emotional and when we left the event, it seemed that people's relationships had changed. It was a nice way to end my nearly two years with the Executive Doctorate.
Tomorrow begins my unemployment. I want to work out, continue reading Jen Weiner's In Her Shoes, continue job hunting, send out a few resumes, and make some calls about looking at new apartments. Busy day!
Wednesday, March 26, 2003
So many things to write about. The cruddy situation at work is off limits. I just can not allow myself to dwell on the negativity that exists. Other topics…
War on television
Happy hour
Lowering my meds
Running into Rosies
Playing Suzette
Writing
1) I can not believe the coverage the war is getting. I am avoiding tv like the plague. I don’t mind reading about war but I firmly believe that we should not be able to watch war. I do not want to see bombing and tanks. It is great that we have technology BUT soldiers are prepared for war in a way that the viewing public is not. My father-out-law (Michelle and my term for each other's parents since we can not legally married and thus do not officially have in-laws) is a Vietnam Vet and the things he saw in Vietnam are still disturbing to him- not that I have heard it directly from him- but Michelle has told me snippets of what she learned from interviewing her Dad for a project in college. I just do not feel equipped to handle what could potentially be shown in war coverage so I just have not been watching it.
2) Next topic, completely unrelated…yesterday was a goodbye Happy Hour from the Higher Ed students. It was super sweet and made me feel like people will actually miss me when I am gone. I even got a gift. So sweet. When to New Deck with Michelle, Michael and Suz afterwards for chicken fingers. That place has the best chicken fingers and fries. Love it!
3) New topic, again…unrelated…went to the psychiatrist today. He lowered my meds by a third! Says I am doing really well. I have a checkup in 8 weeks. It felt good.
4) New topic… ran into two “Rosies” today…Rosemont alums. Michelle refers to her friends from college as “the Rosies.” Saw a girl I was on RA staff with in Borders. Nice to catch up if even for only a few minutes. Then, I chatted with a woman who had graduated from Rosemont in the 70’s. She was sad to see that Rosemont’s campus is so inactive. She was on campus today and remarked that she would have thought it was Spring Break because there were no girls around. I told her that there never are. It is so sad. Rosemont is such an amazing place and I really wish more girls would realize what a blessing going to a women’s college is. I will never regret that decision. Rosemont was such (and continues to be) a blessing in my life.
5) Playing Suzette… My friend Suzette talks to everyone…and I mean everyone. Suz says that Michelle and I are very Northern. Perhaps it is the Southern gal in her. Anyhoo, an example…this summer we were in Vancouver with Michael and Suz. Suz asks three different people for directions to the aquarium in the park. The first person did not sound confident enough when he gave directions so she asked a second person just to confirm. She asked the third guy because he looked like a local and she likes to meet the locals. Okay, maybe I am exaggerating about that, but not by much. Suz really does just talk to anyone. It is one of the (many) great things about being friends with Suz- she will ask the dj at the bowling alley to play different music, she will always ask for directions. It is a hoot and very helpful.
Anyway, moral of the story is that I went to Borders tonight to hear Jennifer Haigh read from her novel Mrs. Kimble which I finished reading approximately 7.5 minutes before the reading. While I was at the reading, I talked to people I don’t know. I don’t do that very much- thus I was "Playing Suzette." It is not that I am socially phobic or anything. I just like minding my own business in public. I hate when people talk to me on the street. I hate when people talk to me in the supermarket. I just want to go about my business without interruption. I read a book or listen to headphones (sometimes both) while riding public transportation just so people will not bother me.
I talked to Jennifer Haigh and Jennifer Weiner both! Granted, it was small talk and not especially bold of me but talking to anyone at all that I do not know is pretty big for me. The fact that I talked to this Rosemont alum in line at the book signing made me "feel some type of way" about myself. I wish I could express that better but my friend Charman used to use that expression all the time and I sometimes feel that it is the perfect expression. I was excited to meet Jen Weiner- she is VERY pregnant!
I feel sort of weird about the fact that I bought Jennifer Haigh’s book and had it signed and did not buy Jen Weiner’s and do the same. Money is so tight right now though. I should not have bought Mrs. Kimble but I really wanted a signed copy after hearing her read from it. It was so amazing to hear her voice of the characters. Of course the author is always going to have a precise voice for her characters. It was so interesting to hear. I have Good in Bed by Jen Weiner and desperately want to buy In Her Shoes which I just took out of the library. I know that eventually I will buy it. It is my next book to read. I am going to start to read it tonight. I just felt awkward after I realized that Jen Weiner was right there, Good in Bed is one of the best books I have read in the past few years, and I did not get her to sign a book. I am fairly certain that we live in the same general neighborhood. I will hopefully catch her on her next book tour. I know she is working on novel #3 although with the baby coming, who knows when that will come out.
I have aspirations of writing for a public audience but I just do not know if I am creative enough to write fiction which is what I really love. Perhaps I will use some of my upcoming free time to work on it. The book reading tonight just really made me think about my own wishes to be a writer. Maybe someday.
War on television
Happy hour
Lowering my meds
Running into Rosies
Playing Suzette
Writing
1) I can not believe the coverage the war is getting. I am avoiding tv like the plague. I don’t mind reading about war but I firmly believe that we should not be able to watch war. I do not want to see bombing and tanks. It is great that we have technology BUT soldiers are prepared for war in a way that the viewing public is not. My father-out-law (Michelle and my term for each other's parents since we can not legally married and thus do not officially have in-laws) is a Vietnam Vet and the things he saw in Vietnam are still disturbing to him- not that I have heard it directly from him- but Michelle has told me snippets of what she learned from interviewing her Dad for a project in college. I just do not feel equipped to handle what could potentially be shown in war coverage so I just have not been watching it.
2) Next topic, completely unrelated…yesterday was a goodbye Happy Hour from the Higher Ed students. It was super sweet and made me feel like people will actually miss me when I am gone. I even got a gift. So sweet. When to New Deck with Michelle, Michael and Suz afterwards for chicken fingers. That place has the best chicken fingers and fries. Love it!
3) New topic, again…unrelated…went to the psychiatrist today. He lowered my meds by a third! Says I am doing really well. I have a checkup in 8 weeks. It felt good.
4) New topic… ran into two “Rosies” today…Rosemont alums. Michelle refers to her friends from college as “the Rosies.” Saw a girl I was on RA staff with in Borders. Nice to catch up if even for only a few minutes. Then, I chatted with a woman who had graduated from Rosemont in the 70’s. She was sad to see that Rosemont’s campus is so inactive. She was on campus today and remarked that she would have thought it was Spring Break because there were no girls around. I told her that there never are. It is so sad. Rosemont is such an amazing place and I really wish more girls would realize what a blessing going to a women’s college is. I will never regret that decision. Rosemont was such (and continues to be) a blessing in my life.
5) Playing Suzette… My friend Suzette talks to everyone…and I mean everyone. Suz says that Michelle and I are very Northern. Perhaps it is the Southern gal in her. Anyhoo, an example…this summer we were in Vancouver with Michael and Suz. Suz asks three different people for directions to the aquarium in the park. The first person did not sound confident enough when he gave directions so she asked a second person just to confirm. She asked the third guy because he looked like a local and she likes to meet the locals. Okay, maybe I am exaggerating about that, but not by much. Suz really does just talk to anyone. It is one of the (many) great things about being friends with Suz- she will ask the dj at the bowling alley to play different music, she will always ask for directions. It is a hoot and very helpful.
Anyway, moral of the story is that I went to Borders tonight to hear Jennifer Haigh read from her novel Mrs. Kimble which I finished reading approximately 7.5 minutes before the reading. While I was at the reading, I talked to people I don’t know. I don’t do that very much- thus I was "Playing Suzette." It is not that I am socially phobic or anything. I just like minding my own business in public. I hate when people talk to me on the street. I hate when people talk to me in the supermarket. I just want to go about my business without interruption. I read a book or listen to headphones (sometimes both) while riding public transportation just so people will not bother me.
I talked to Jennifer Haigh and Jennifer Weiner both! Granted, it was small talk and not especially bold of me but talking to anyone at all that I do not know is pretty big for me. The fact that I talked to this Rosemont alum in line at the book signing made me "feel some type of way" about myself. I wish I could express that better but my friend Charman used to use that expression all the time and I sometimes feel that it is the perfect expression. I was excited to meet Jen Weiner- she is VERY pregnant!
I feel sort of weird about the fact that I bought Jennifer Haigh’s book and had it signed and did not buy Jen Weiner’s and do the same. Money is so tight right now though. I should not have bought Mrs. Kimble but I really wanted a signed copy after hearing her read from it. It was so amazing to hear her voice of the characters. Of course the author is always going to have a precise voice for her characters. It was so interesting to hear. I have Good in Bed by Jen Weiner and desperately want to buy In Her Shoes which I just took out of the library. I know that eventually I will buy it. It is my next book to read. I am going to start to read it tonight. I just felt awkward after I realized that Jen Weiner was right there, Good in Bed is one of the best books I have read in the past few years, and I did not get her to sign a book. I am fairly certain that we live in the same general neighborhood. I will hopefully catch her on her next book tour. I know she is working on novel #3 although with the baby coming, who knows when that will come out.
I have aspirations of writing for a public audience but I just do not know if I am creative enough to write fiction which is what I really love. Perhaps I will use some of my upcoming free time to work on it. The book reading tonight just really made me think about my own wishes to be a writer. Maybe someday.
Monday, March 24, 2003
As I posted in my previous blog, I am very upset about the idea that speaking out against the government is being considered by some to be unpatriotic.
I am sorry that Michael Moore got booed last night on the Oscars. I don’t know that the Oscars is the ideal forum at which to speak one’s piece but Michael Moore, doing the work he does, is a cultural and societal critic. He would not have been being true to his work and his beliefs if he had not said something.
Below is an excerpt from an e-mail newsletter I get from the folk group: The Nields. I saw Narissa and Katryna Nields perform when I was in college and I have been following them ever since. Below is an excerpt from an e-mail that Narissa sent today. Like Narissa, I think the criticism of Natalie Maines is ridiculous.
The Nields Website
Nerissa's note:
Also, I am calling my senators to tell them what I think of this war and how our government is handling things, because as helpless as I feel, I know I'll feel better if I throw my drop into a bucket I believe in.
I read this today in the New York Times:
Many music and radio executives said that they felt that artists were being discouraged from doing anything out of the normal. They pointed to the recent flap over disparaging comments Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks made about President Bush, which has led to her music being banned on several radio stations and promotional stunts that involve dumping Dixie Chicks CD's into trash cans. They also mentioned that producers of both the Grammy Awards and the Academy Awards have asked winners not to mention the international situation in their acceptance speeches. (The Dixie Chicks' lead singer, Natalie Maines, told a London audience, "Just so you know, we're ashamed the president of the United States is from Texas.")
Questioning the patriotism of Hollywood activists is a favorite theme of celebrity-bashing Internet sites. Famousidiot.com is a case in point. Under the banner, "They don't speak for US," the site ranks celebrities according to the number of "anti-Americanisms" they've supposedly uttered.
**********************************************************************
Number One: I find myself in the unusual position of being grateful that I am not famous enough to get radio play and therefore do not have to worry about having it taken away from me. Natalie Maines said what she wanted to say andis being punished for her First Amendment right to speak her mind. The rules are different in wartime? Oh, dear. I think I will buy a few extra copies of the Dixie Chicks new album Home to give to people as gifts. (It's one of my favorite albums of 2002. It rocks.)
Number Two: What is "patriotism"? I learned in school that this word meant deep love and support of one's country.
I am a patriot. I love the United States of America. I pledge my allegience. Does that mean I do not question authority? Does that mean bow my head and go along when a President (who was not actually elected by a majority of the people) deliberately misleads the public by trying to make us believe that an (albeit unsavory and nasty) dictator was responsible for the attact of 9/11 when in fact there is no evidence at all to support that?
This land was made for you and me. O beautiful, for purple mountains, for amber waves, for spacious skies, for brotherhood and sisterhood and religious freedom and tolerance. For refuge, for the open arms of Ellis Island and the dignified serenity and pride of the Statue of Liberty (a gift from the French, by the way).
Today, I am going to be grateful that my enforced confinement here is keeping me from using any more fossil fuel. Every day I choose not to drive isanother drop in that bucket I believe in. I will take this day to write my songs and novels and make phone calls and write e-mails, walk my dog, clean my house, pray for peace. And support the troops abroad by praying for their safety and also the safety of those they are bombing. It's a paradox, butthat's what life's about.
God bless you all, and God bless the United States of America. And God bless the land and people of Iraq.
Love, Nerissa
Just wanted to share Nerissa’s thoughts with you.
On a side note, my life is chaos. Work is out of control. I am going to the batting cages with my Dad and brother Bobby tonight, something totally out of the norm for me. I am so excited to be going to a place where hitting something is encouraged. I need to get the random energy and anxiety out. Hopefully I will actually make contact. I have not swung a bat in 12 years.
Peace to each of you.
I am sorry that Michael Moore got booed last night on the Oscars. I don’t know that the Oscars is the ideal forum at which to speak one’s piece but Michael Moore, doing the work he does, is a cultural and societal critic. He would not have been being true to his work and his beliefs if he had not said something.
Below is an excerpt from an e-mail newsletter I get from the folk group: The Nields. I saw Narissa and Katryna Nields perform when I was in college and I have been following them ever since. Below is an excerpt from an e-mail that Narissa sent today. Like Narissa, I think the criticism of Natalie Maines is ridiculous.
The Nields Website
Nerissa's note:
Also, I am calling my senators to tell them what I think of this war and how our government is handling things, because as helpless as I feel, I know I'll feel better if I throw my drop into a bucket I believe in.
I read this today in the New York Times:
Many music and radio executives said that they felt that artists were being discouraged from doing anything out of the normal. They pointed to the recent flap over disparaging comments Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks made about President Bush, which has led to her music being banned on several radio stations and promotional stunts that involve dumping Dixie Chicks CD's into trash cans. They also mentioned that producers of both the Grammy Awards and the Academy Awards have asked winners not to mention the international situation in their acceptance speeches. (The Dixie Chicks' lead singer, Natalie Maines, told a London audience, "Just so you know, we're ashamed the president of the United States is from Texas.")
Questioning the patriotism of Hollywood activists is a favorite theme of celebrity-bashing Internet sites. Famousidiot.com is a case in point. Under the banner, "They don't speak for US," the site ranks celebrities according to the number of "anti-Americanisms" they've supposedly uttered.
**********************************************************************
Number One: I find myself in the unusual position of being grateful that I am not famous enough to get radio play and therefore do not have to worry about having it taken away from me. Natalie Maines said what she wanted to say andis being punished for her First Amendment right to speak her mind. The rules are different in wartime? Oh, dear. I think I will buy a few extra copies of the Dixie Chicks new album Home to give to people as gifts. (It's one of my favorite albums of 2002. It rocks.)
Number Two: What is "patriotism"? I learned in school that this word meant deep love and support of one's country.
I am a patriot. I love the United States of America. I pledge my allegience. Does that mean I do not question authority? Does that mean bow my head and go along when a President (who was not actually elected by a majority of the people) deliberately misleads the public by trying to make us believe that an (albeit unsavory and nasty) dictator was responsible for the attact of 9/11 when in fact there is no evidence at all to support that?
This land was made for you and me. O beautiful, for purple mountains, for amber waves, for spacious skies, for brotherhood and sisterhood and religious freedom and tolerance. For refuge, for the open arms of Ellis Island and the dignified serenity and pride of the Statue of Liberty (a gift from the French, by the way).
Today, I am going to be grateful that my enforced confinement here is keeping me from using any more fossil fuel. Every day I choose not to drive isanother drop in that bucket I believe in. I will take this day to write my songs and novels and make phone calls and write e-mails, walk my dog, clean my house, pray for peace. And support the troops abroad by praying for their safety and also the safety of those they are bombing. It's a paradox, butthat's what life's about.
God bless you all, and God bless the United States of America. And God bless the land and people of Iraq.
Love, Nerissa
Just wanted to share Nerissa’s thoughts with you.
On a side note, my life is chaos. Work is out of control. I am going to the batting cages with my Dad and brother Bobby tonight, something totally out of the norm for me. I am so excited to be going to a place where hitting something is encouraged. I need to get the random energy and anxiety out. Hopefully I will actually make contact. I have not swung a bat in 12 years.
Peace to each of you.
Saturday, March 22, 2003
I am appalled.Today's MSN poll: Are anti-war protests anti-American? Response: 49% of respondents say "yes."
ARE YOU KIDDING ME????????
Protesting is about as American as you can get. If being American means supporting the government blindly than Irqis are American. These people get tortured and killed for speaking out against the government. I am no history, politics, law expert, but I know enough to know that protests are what being American is all about. Remember the right to free speech people!?
I am appalled!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME????????
Protesting is about as American as you can get. If being American means supporting the government blindly than Irqis are American. These people get tortured and killed for speaking out against the government. I am no history, politics, law expert, but I know enough to know that protests are what being American is all about. Remember the right to free speech people!?
I am appalled!
Thursday, March 20, 2003
I am neither smart enough or rational enough to blog about the war. It is too overwhelming to me to be a managable topic for blogging.
Simpler things:
In times of uncertainty, I turn to the simplest and most familiar forms of entertainment to distraction. For example, I am currently listening to the Carpenters Love Songs. For the past week, I have listened to at least thirty minutes of Barry Manilow in work. I know that both are joke worthy but to me, they are comforting. They make me think of my Mom and Dad, my Gram and Pop. For the two years that my Pop outlived my Gram, the Carpenters Love Songs was his constant. I think of him, and his love for my Gram everytime I hear Karen Carpenter's beatifully haunting voice. I miss them everyday. I miss their strange jokes, the crazy dynamic they shared, and my Gram's constant humming and singing.
Speaking of singing, American Idol has been a great distraction from the current world situation. Don't get me wrong, I make sure I am informed. I read the news, check in on CNN and MSNBC several times a day. But having some frivolous things to focus on are much appreciated. I am loving Ruben and Clay. Those boys can sing! I can not believe how different they are from each other but I predict that both will be in the final four.
Final four: I know almost nothing about college basketball but we did our brackets in my (soon to be former) office. So far, I am not doing too badly in my blind picks- I mostly chose by picking teams that are from Exec Doc schools! We have everyone's picks posted and we even have a leader board. I will miss this kind of craziness when I leave my job. Craziness like people making a huge fuss over Michelle's delicious homemade cookies, Matt's endless supply of sweater vests, Kelly's general looniness and all around sense of humor, Michael exploding a soda in the office mini-freezer, Doug's dirty gym socks on the window sill of his office. It feels so strange to only have a week left in this job. I can only imagine what it will be like.
Simpler things:
In times of uncertainty, I turn to the simplest and most familiar forms of entertainment to distraction. For example, I am currently listening to the Carpenters Love Songs. For the past week, I have listened to at least thirty minutes of Barry Manilow in work. I know that both are joke worthy but to me, they are comforting. They make me think of my Mom and Dad, my Gram and Pop. For the two years that my Pop outlived my Gram, the Carpenters Love Songs was his constant. I think of him, and his love for my Gram everytime I hear Karen Carpenter's beatifully haunting voice. I miss them everyday. I miss their strange jokes, the crazy dynamic they shared, and my Gram's constant humming and singing.
Speaking of singing, American Idol has been a great distraction from the current world situation. Don't get me wrong, I make sure I am informed. I read the news, check in on CNN and MSNBC several times a day. But having some frivolous things to focus on are much appreciated. I am loving Ruben and Clay. Those boys can sing! I can not believe how different they are from each other but I predict that both will be in the final four.
Final four: I know almost nothing about college basketball but we did our brackets in my (soon to be former) office. So far, I am not doing too badly in my blind picks- I mostly chose by picking teams that are from Exec Doc schools! We have everyone's picks posted and we even have a leader board. I will miss this kind of craziness when I leave my job. Craziness like people making a huge fuss over Michelle's delicious homemade cookies, Matt's endless supply of sweater vests, Kelly's general looniness and all around sense of humor, Michael exploding a soda in the office mini-freezer, Doug's dirty gym socks on the window sill of his office. It feels so strange to only have a week left in this job. I can only imagine what it will be like.
Wednesday, March 19, 2003
I feel so overwhelmed about how much I have to write about. I will try to just outline it:
I quit my job. Gave two weeks notice. Am taking the plunge- no net. I have no job to move onto. I am hoping to substitute teach for awhile. I am pretty much scared out of my mind that I am not going to find anything to do and that Michelle and I are not going to have money.
I am really nervous about the war. I do not know what else to say about that.
I found a blog by Jennifer Weiner who wrote Good in Bed (which I loved) and In Her Shoes (which I have not yet read) and who lives in Philadelphia. I have said it before and I will say it again, it is very cool for me to read about a place where I live and where I know. I was reading the archives on Jen's blog and I was thrilled again and again to read about place I know- from the Super Fresh on 5th Street to the Independence Branch of the Free Library. Anyhoo, I am going to put her site on my list of links. Stop by if you are interested in something funny!
I finished two great books this weekend. Empire Falls by Richard Russo and Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli. Empire Falls was a wonderful portrait of small town life but not in a fluffy quaint way. It was complex and interesting but still intimate. Stargirl was written for young adults but is wonderful for any reader. The narration by a teenage boy of the transformation of a high school because of one girl who insists on her individuality is perfectly pitched and insightful. Both books were delightful to read.
I hope to be a little better with blogging regularly. We'll see. I will have more free time in less than two weeks.
I quit my job. Gave two weeks notice. Am taking the plunge- no net. I have no job to move onto. I am hoping to substitute teach for awhile. I am pretty much scared out of my mind that I am not going to find anything to do and that Michelle and I are not going to have money.
I am really nervous about the war. I do not know what else to say about that.
I found a blog by Jennifer Weiner who wrote Good in Bed (which I loved) and In Her Shoes (which I have not yet read) and who lives in Philadelphia. I have said it before and I will say it again, it is very cool for me to read about a place where I live and where I know. I was reading the archives on Jen's blog and I was thrilled again and again to read about place I know- from the Super Fresh on 5th Street to the Independence Branch of the Free Library. Anyhoo, I am going to put her site on my list of links. Stop by if you are interested in something funny!
I finished two great books this weekend. Empire Falls by Richard Russo and Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli. Empire Falls was a wonderful portrait of small town life but not in a fluffy quaint way. It was complex and interesting but still intimate. Stargirl was written for young adults but is wonderful for any reader. The narration by a teenage boy of the transformation of a high school because of one girl who insists on her individuality is perfectly pitched and insightful. Both books were delightful to read.
I hope to be a little better with blogging regularly. We'll see. I will have more free time in less than two weeks.
Friday, March 14, 2003
I could not be happier that this week is over! What a long week of the flu, nonsense at work, financial stresses, and just plain fatigue.
I will be celebrating tonight with Michelle, our pal Kelly, and our token straight guy friend, Michael. Just kidding. Michael and I have a crazy friendship (almost as crazy as the one between he and Michelle). Michael started working as my intern in September 2001 and we have been pretty much best buds since then. It is a strange pairing- a Catholic lesbian from Philadelphia and a married Southern Baptist from North Carolina. We are lucky that our minds are open enough to appreciate our differences. (Plus, he has a car, while I do not even have a drivers license so that helps too! Heehee!)
So we are going bowling AGAIN! I guess we could do something different: play board games, go see a movie, something other than bowling. Nothing else is quite as fun as bowling though! So off we go again. I actually bowled a 61 earlier this week. 61! I think that is the worst I have ever been- and trust me, I am pretty bad!
I am heading out of work shortly and off to blow off some steam.
A shout out to my friend Suzette who had a big interview today! I know you kicked butt! We will miss you for bowling tonight. Don't worry about Michael. We are taking good care of him!
I will be celebrating tonight with Michelle, our pal Kelly, and our token straight guy friend, Michael. Just kidding. Michael and I have a crazy friendship (almost as crazy as the one between he and Michelle). Michael started working as my intern in September 2001 and we have been pretty much best buds since then. It is a strange pairing- a Catholic lesbian from Philadelphia and a married Southern Baptist from North Carolina. We are lucky that our minds are open enough to appreciate our differences. (Plus, he has a car, while I do not even have a drivers license so that helps too! Heehee!)
So we are going bowling AGAIN! I guess we could do something different: play board games, go see a movie, something other than bowling. Nothing else is quite as fun as bowling though! So off we go again. I actually bowled a 61 earlier this week. 61! I think that is the worst I have ever been- and trust me, I am pretty bad!
I am heading out of work shortly and off to blow off some steam.
A shout out to my friend Suzette who had a big interview today! I know you kicked butt! We will miss you for bowling tonight. Don't worry about Michael. We are taking good care of him!
Thursday, March 13, 2003
I can't believe Elizabeth Smart was found alive. I have seen the pictures and have read and heard the news stories but I am still having trouble believing it.
I am a human interest story junkie. It drives Michelle crazy! I can not pass The Learning Channel when they are profiling conjoined twins. I love it when 60 Minutes, 20/20, Dateline, etc do their follow up stories on multiple births, people who hoard their belongings, and siblings who were separated by birth.
Michelle says I am a voyeur and that I just can't help being drawn into other people's stories. I don't know why I feel this way but I have always felt fascinated by people and their stories:
Jessica McClure- the baby in the well
the Florida "switched at birth" twins
the Pennsylvania miners- I stayed up nearly all night watching that coverage on CNN
any number of Olympians- Kerry Strug, Janet Evans, Jim Shea
I don't think I will ever reform. My dream job would be to host the Today Show. I want to talk to politicians, authors, movie stars, people who have successful weight loss stories, a lifeguard who survived a shark attack, and the newest human interest story.
I am a human interest story junkie. It drives Michelle crazy! I can not pass The Learning Channel when they are profiling conjoined twins. I love it when 60 Minutes, 20/20, Dateline, etc do their follow up stories on multiple births, people who hoard their belongings, and siblings who were separated by birth.
Michelle says I am a voyeur and that I just can't help being drawn into other people's stories. I don't know why I feel this way but I have always felt fascinated by people and their stories:
Jessica McClure- the baby in the well
the Florida "switched at birth" twins
the Pennsylvania miners- I stayed up nearly all night watching that coverage on CNN
any number of Olympians- Kerry Strug, Janet Evans, Jim Shea
I don't think I will ever reform. My dream job would be to host the Today Show. I want to talk to politicians, authors, movie stars, people who have successful weight loss stories, a lifeguard who survived a shark attack, and the newest human interest story.
Tuesday, March 11, 2003
I spent the morning reading blogs. I am fascinated by the amount of talented people out there who are writing and sharing and are doing so really well. I think one of the keys to good writing is creating something that others can identify with or can escape into. Novelists, screenwriters, and other professionals do this on a semi-regular basis. It is wonderful, though, to enjoy the work of so many who are using the internet to share their work.
One of the blogs I have been reading for a few weeks is a great illustration of writing about a specific instance in a universal way. Stacey George Scroll to Stacey's March 6 entry for a very funny and touching story. I remember a few years ago when my dad had a similar talk with my brother, who is now 12 years old. Bobby ended the conversation by telling my Dad, “I think I have learned enough for today, Dad.” So funny!
Speaking of parents, I heard about the most extraordinary family yesterday, the Bollmanns of Virginia. They were on Oprah yesterday as well as on ABC Family Channel’s My Life is A Sitcom. The Bollmann’s started off like most families- Mom, Dad, two sons, two daughters- a little larger than most families today and a little more faithful in terms of religious beliefs. Then a family moved in next door with seven children. The neighboring kids and the Bollmann kids get to be friends. Soon Mom and Dad Bollmann notice that the neighbor kids have rotting teeth. The youngest neighbor daughter asks Mom Bollmann to be her Mom. It is at this point that the Bollmann’s realize that there is a bigger issue here. Alot of stuff happens (I know, I am a gifted story teller!) The neighbor kids are eventually adopted by the Bollmann’s resulting in a multi-racial family of 11 kids! Crazy! The kids have since formed a music group called Blended. They have been on Good Morning America, Sally Jesse Raphael, and now Oprah and My Life is a Sitcom. I was just enthralled by this family. First of all, I know some adoptive parents and they are pretty much the most giving people I have ever met. But to adopt 7 siblings into your three bedroom, 1 bath home! Luckily the Bollmann’s live in a supportive community and have been able to expand their house to 6 bedrooms and have added a bathroom. Still, dear Lord!! Anyhoo, I think they are amazing. Here is the link to their official site: Bollmann Family
Enjoy!
One of the blogs I have been reading for a few weeks is a great illustration of writing about a specific instance in a universal way. Stacey George Scroll to Stacey's March 6 entry for a very funny and touching story. I remember a few years ago when my dad had a similar talk with my brother, who is now 12 years old. Bobby ended the conversation by telling my Dad, “I think I have learned enough for today, Dad.” So funny!
Speaking of parents, I heard about the most extraordinary family yesterday, the Bollmanns of Virginia. They were on Oprah yesterday as well as on ABC Family Channel’s My Life is A Sitcom. The Bollmann’s started off like most families- Mom, Dad, two sons, two daughters- a little larger than most families today and a little more faithful in terms of religious beliefs. Then a family moved in next door with seven children. The neighboring kids and the Bollmann kids get to be friends. Soon Mom and Dad Bollmann notice that the neighbor kids have rotting teeth. The youngest neighbor daughter asks Mom Bollmann to be her Mom. It is at this point that the Bollmann’s realize that there is a bigger issue here. Alot of stuff happens (I know, I am a gifted story teller!) The neighbor kids are eventually adopted by the Bollmann’s resulting in a multi-racial family of 11 kids! Crazy! The kids have since formed a music group called Blended. They have been on Good Morning America, Sally Jesse Raphael, and now Oprah and My Life is a Sitcom. I was just enthralled by this family. First of all, I know some adoptive parents and they are pretty much the most giving people I have ever met. But to adopt 7 siblings into your three bedroom, 1 bath home! Luckily the Bollmann’s live in a supportive community and have been able to expand their house to 6 bedrooms and have added a bathroom. Still, dear Lord!! Anyhoo, I think they are amazing. Here is the link to their official site: Bollmann Family
Enjoy!
Sunday, March 09, 2003
I got the flu from my boss. I am less than thrilled. I somehow managed to avoid getting it from Michelle who was in bed for nearly two weeks with the flu, but I get hit with it from my boss who came into the office three days in a row this week while he was sick. Argh! I hate being sick.
On a more positive note, I read a really awesome book this weekend: Good in Bed by Jennifer Weiner. It is one of those books that I have picked up in a book store about a million times in the past year. I bought it on Thursday just because I was looking for something light to read. I absolutely love Cannie, the main character. I love books where I wish I was friends with the characters. Cannie is complex and funny and sensitive. One of the things that I loved so much about this book is that most of it is set in Philadelphia. It is so wonderful to read about streets that I walk on each day, neighborhoods that I know well. I wonder if the appeal of familiarity has worn off for people in New York. So many books, movies, tv shows, etc are set in New York. For me, it is such a treat when I read something set in the Philadelphia area: The Bee Season by Myla Goldberg, The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold.
I love Philadelphia. I am job hunting and in the process, have been weighing the pros and cons of relocating. I was talking about this dilemma in work yesterday. My boss was telling me that I would like Pittsburgh and when he asked what Philly had that Pitt didn't, I replied "my Mom." I don't know if that is weakness or strength. There are many many things I love about Philadelphia but the most important is that my family is here. We are not people who take moving lightly. I grew up in a house only three streets away from where my Mom grew up. Cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles all within 5 minutes. It was totally acceptable to drop by unannounced, raid the fridge, plop down to watch tv. I don't do that anymore but it is the fact that all of that is still acceptable: very comforting.
Anyhow, the book was fabulous and I really want to get the next book by Jennifer Weiner. Since I have the flu, perhaps I will have time to read it!
On a more positive note, I read a really awesome book this weekend: Good in Bed by Jennifer Weiner. It is one of those books that I have picked up in a book store about a million times in the past year. I bought it on Thursday just because I was looking for something light to read. I absolutely love Cannie, the main character. I love books where I wish I was friends with the characters. Cannie is complex and funny and sensitive. One of the things that I loved so much about this book is that most of it is set in Philadelphia. It is so wonderful to read about streets that I walk on each day, neighborhoods that I know well. I wonder if the appeal of familiarity has worn off for people in New York. So many books, movies, tv shows, etc are set in New York. For me, it is such a treat when I read something set in the Philadelphia area: The Bee Season by Myla Goldberg, The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold.
I love Philadelphia. I am job hunting and in the process, have been weighing the pros and cons of relocating. I was talking about this dilemma in work yesterday. My boss was telling me that I would like Pittsburgh and when he asked what Philly had that Pitt didn't, I replied "my Mom." I don't know if that is weakness or strength. There are many many things I love about Philadelphia but the most important is that my family is here. We are not people who take moving lightly. I grew up in a house only three streets away from where my Mom grew up. Cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles all within 5 minutes. It was totally acceptable to drop by unannounced, raid the fridge, plop down to watch tv. I don't do that anymore but it is the fact that all of that is still acceptable: very comforting.
Anyhow, the book was fabulous and I really want to get the next book by Jennifer Weiner. Since I have the flu, perhaps I will have time to read it!
Thursday, March 06, 2003
I need to get my medicine refilled. For the first time today I do not feel all jittery and anxious but my head is pounding with a headache. I guess I do not realize how much the medicine changes the way my body works. I am having a much harder time sitting still today than I usually do. The medicine takes away alot of my nervous energy so not having taken it today, my leg has been bouncing and my toes have been tapping. I do not feel very anxious though, just restless.
I did a Speaker's Bureau Panel yesterday for the LGBT Center here at Penn. It is at times like that when I realize just how unhappy I am in my job. I am job hunting. I know that I am in the wrong job. But it is so unbelievable to go to the LGBT Center and realize that running these events is someone's job. Getting paid for teaching people and exposing people to new ideas- concepts and arguements they have not considered before. I am hoping to work more closely with traditional students in my next job.
Well, I have to go deal with my current job responsibilities so I am off for now.
More soon.
I did a Speaker's Bureau Panel yesterday for the LGBT Center here at Penn. It is at times like that when I realize just how unhappy I am in my job. I am job hunting. I know that I am in the wrong job. But it is so unbelievable to go to the LGBT Center and realize that running these events is someone's job. Getting paid for teaching people and exposing people to new ideas- concepts and arguements they have not considered before. I am hoping to work more closely with traditional students in my next job.
Well, I have to go deal with my current job responsibilities so I am off for now.
More soon.
Tuesday, March 04, 2003
I have panic disorder with agoraphobia, hence the title Rainbow Chills. Rainbow for the gayness and for the beauty after the yucky times. Chills for those amazing moments when you feel infinite (from Stephen Chobsky's book Perks of Being a Wallflower which I love!) and for those moments when my panic makes me want to run screaming into a cave.
Oprah today was entitled People who are afraid of people. Very interesting. Jamie Blythe from the Bachelorette (not that I watched) was one of the guests. He has social phobia. I was very impressed with his use of so many terms I know. Words that are used in self help books and cognitive-behavioral therapy to help those of us who suffer and struggle with anxiety. Words like: positive self talk, countering negative thoughts, catastrophic thinking. I could identify with so much of what he said and although his method of staring down the anxiety is not one that I use, I felt that he was sincerely sharing his struggle with us. I could feel his pain and mine when he talked about panic and wanting to break down in tears so often.
I was, however, confused by the non-famous anxiety sufferer who Oprah interviewed. This woman has not had a hair cut in two years due to her social phobia yet she was very cool on the Oprah show. She seemed really calm and said she felt nearly no anxiety. I am not sure if her andrenaline was carrying her through but for me, adrenaline just kicks me in to fight or flight and I certainly am not calm.
Don't get me wrong, I have worked long and hard at kicking anxiety's butt (as Mandy Jane often says), and continue to do so. I am not saying people are not capable of getting better. But this gal seemed to be doing a 180 as to her anxiety. I hope some of the guys and gals at ENcourage can help me by sharing their reviews of the Oprah episode. I do not mean to be critical. I was just surprised by the calmness that this woman was able to exude while in a room with so many strangers, knowing she was on national television. I am on medication, off caffeine, practicing deep breathing, and using loads of coping techniques and though I think I could go on national tv, I know I would be more nervous than this gal was.
Anyhoo, the Gilmore Girls is a repeat tonight so Michelle is out renting a DVD and picking up Chinese food so I am off.
Until tomorrow...
Oprah today was entitled People who are afraid of people. Very interesting. Jamie Blythe from the Bachelorette (not that I watched) was one of the guests. He has social phobia. I was very impressed with his use of so many terms I know. Words that are used in self help books and cognitive-behavioral therapy to help those of us who suffer and struggle with anxiety. Words like: positive self talk, countering negative thoughts, catastrophic thinking. I could identify with so much of what he said and although his method of staring down the anxiety is not one that I use, I felt that he was sincerely sharing his struggle with us. I could feel his pain and mine when he talked about panic and wanting to break down in tears so often.
I was, however, confused by the non-famous anxiety sufferer who Oprah interviewed. This woman has not had a hair cut in two years due to her social phobia yet she was very cool on the Oprah show. She seemed really calm and said she felt nearly no anxiety. I am not sure if her andrenaline was carrying her through but for me, adrenaline just kicks me in to fight or flight and I certainly am not calm.
Don't get me wrong, I have worked long and hard at kicking anxiety's butt (as Mandy Jane often says), and continue to do so. I am not saying people are not capable of getting better. But this gal seemed to be doing a 180 as to her anxiety. I hope some of the guys and gals at ENcourage can help me by sharing their reviews of the Oprah episode. I do not mean to be critical. I was just surprised by the calmness that this woman was able to exude while in a room with so many strangers, knowing she was on national television. I am on medication, off caffeine, practicing deep breathing, and using loads of coping techniques and though I think I could go on national tv, I know I would be more nervous than this gal was.
Anyhoo, the Gilmore Girls is a repeat tonight so Michelle is out renting a DVD and picking up Chinese food so I am off.
Until tomorrow...
Monday, March 03, 2003
I am addicted to blogging! For me, it has become all about linking to other people's blogs, reading blogs, changing the template of my blog to include links, etc, etc, etc. If I spent this this much time on my job search, I would be doing something rewarding by now, rather than my current job.
The whole blogging thing is getting out of hand. Even Michael is doing it now. His wife is going to kill me when she finds out that he did no work on his dissertation, yet again today! Poor Suzette! I spend nearly all day distracting poor Michael from doing his work and then he goes home and has to do school work! Sorry Suz!
Mondays are the worst. I feel like Marcus in About A Boy, I am about to break out in song- Rainy days and Mondays always get me down! But the work day is nearly over and I have made it through in one piece!
Heaven help me make it through the next 20 minutes!
The whole blogging thing is getting out of hand. Even Michael is doing it now. His wife is going to kill me when she finds out that he did no work on his dissertation, yet again today! Poor Suzette! I spend nearly all day distracting poor Michael from doing his work and then he goes home and has to do school work! Sorry Suz!
Mondays are the worst. I feel like Marcus in About A Boy, I am about to break out in song- Rainy days and Mondays always get me down! But the work day is nearly over and I have made it through in one piece!
Heaven help me make it through the next 20 minutes!
Sunday, March 02, 2003
I can hardly believe that the weekend is nearly over. And what have I accomplished this weekend- pretty much nothing.
The bowling trip was considerably less fun than the past several had been. Better luck next time.
I got my hair cut Saturday- nearly 4 inches off the length. I swear- there is no relationship like the one you have with your hair stylist! Mine is a riot! Fun, funny, and fabulous.
I have been driving everyone aound me totally mad by quoting the song from my last post- The Superbowl is gay. Michelle is threatening to injure me if I do not stop singing it! I do it anyway and giggle away. That kid is genius!
Rosie O'Donnell True Hollywood Story is on E! tonight. I am psyched! I love television biographies almost as much as I love Rosie O'Donnell. Of all the celebs I love (and there are many), I love Rosie the most. And I am totally fascinated by her personal life. Kelli, the kids (Parker, Chelsea, Blake, Vivi Rose, and Mia, the foster child), the magazine scandal, the relationship with the multiple described in her book, the obsession with celebs showcased on the talk show... I could go on and on. In short, I am intrigued.
The bowling trip was considerably less fun than the past several had been. Better luck next time.
I got my hair cut Saturday- nearly 4 inches off the length. I swear- there is no relationship like the one you have with your hair stylist! Mine is a riot! Fun, funny, and fabulous.
I have been driving everyone aound me totally mad by quoting the song from my last post- The Superbowl is gay. Michelle is threatening to injure me if I do not stop singing it! I do it anyway and giggle away. That kid is genius!
Rosie O'Donnell True Hollywood Story is on E! tonight. I am psyched! I love television biographies almost as much as I love Rosie O'Donnell. Of all the celebs I love (and there are many), I love Rosie the most. And I am totally fascinated by her personal life. Kelli, the kids (Parker, Chelsea, Blake, Vivi Rose, and Mia, the foster child), the magazine scandal, the relationship with the multiple described in her book, the obsession with celebs showcased on the talk show... I could go on and on. In short, I am intrigued.
